


the unfallen

by JayQueenofHugs (bifangirl)



Series: Dimension 20 Character Studies [1]
Category: Dimension 20 (Web Series)
Genre: Character Study, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Guilt, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Introspection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-05-09
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:00:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24086254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bifangirl/pseuds/JayQueenofHugs
Summary: He wasn't supposed to be king.
Series: Dimension 20 Character Studies [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1740490
Comments: 11
Kudos: 27





	the unfallen

**Author's Note:**

> Listen, I had to get this out of my system (spoilers for ACoC 5)

When the war is finally over and won, when everything is over and comes to a halt, the kingdom of Candia mourns for the fallen princesses. Amethar feels numbed by shock and grief, something in his brain is screaming and crying out in pain but he can’t let it show, there’s something stopping the tears. And that same something in his brain starts whispering to him, reminding him that he’s heir now, and something about that stings the most. _He wasn’t supposed to be king._

A crown is placed on Amethar’s head as a crowd cheers around him, but only one thought echoes in his mind because his sisters are gone and he was never supposed to rule. He marries Caramelinda of House Meringue, puts his past marriage out of his mind because he needs to rule now, tries to figure out what he’s supposed to do because he’s not cut out for this, not prepared in the slightest. _He wasn’t supposed to be king._

He watches his daughters grow up, teaches them tricks and how to sneak out, feels a pang every time because Sapphria was always like that and his sisters would have been so proud. He goes to the statues often, talks to them like their ghosts could hear him, tells them what’s happening in the castle and in his life, treats them as though they were alive. And it hurts him every time when he leaves, when he remembers that they’re cold statues, that they’re all dead and gone. Everytime he sees them, he thinks of how much better they would be at leading than him and he feels a pang of sorrow and _guilt_. _He wasn’t supposed to be king._

Caramelinda lectures Amethar often about the twins’ tricks, Theobald’s frustration with the girls’ exploits are clear, Lapin is always annoyed with them, but he doesn’t want to stop them at all. It makes them happy, reminds him of his own childhood, reminds him how quickly happiness and innocence can be torn away. Payment Day reminds him of everything he’s lost, the things he never wants his daughters to go through. He wants them to be happy, wants them to live a happy life. And he knows that Jet doesn’t want to be queen and he wishes it didn’t resonate so much with him. _He wasn’t supposed to be king._

A letter arrives from Gustavo and with it comes the mocking reminder that he never learned how to read. The contents of the letter feel even more like a slap in the face. Gustavo is dying and going to pick his successor and Amethar doesn’t want this but he doesn’t have a choice in the matter. It hurts him to know that he’ll be given more power when he doesn’t even want the power he already has. He doesn’t want to be emperor, he doesn’t want the responsibility. He doesn’t deserve it either. _He wasn’t supposed to be king._

They’re attacked on the road to Comida, Ruby collapsing with an arrow through her neck as another arrow thuds into her fallen body. And Amethar sees _red_. Somewhere in the back of his mind is the reminder of finding Rococoa’s body after Pangranos. Somewhere in the back of his mind is the reminder of Lazuli’s uncharacteristic sacrifice, her death. Somewhere in the back of his mind is the reminder of Citrina’s death, her own sacrifice. And somewhere in the back of his mind is the reminder of hearing the news of Sapphria’s death. Amethar cannot go through more loss. And when Theobald takes an arrow for him, when Lapin dedicates so much to healing him, he’s painfully reminded of his status. _He wasn’t supposed to be king._

The conversation with Manta Ray Jack at the banquet reminds him of the mistakes he made before the war, the mistakes he was never able to fix. And he doesn’t know if they’ll come back to haunt him, he never thought of the consequences at the time and he certainly doesn’t want to think about them now. Maybe it’s irresponsible of him but he can’t bring himself to care. _He wasn’t supposed to be king._

The banquet and tournament bring into perspective just how much status he has. Calroy is there to keep him from making a fool of himself, thankfully, but navigating the political environment is still difficult. And then, in the tournament, he almost dies. It fully hits him that he’s important enough to be assassinated, that he has enough status for someone to attempt to kill him. And the rush of everyone to protect him hits harder. He doesn’t want to be protected, he loves battle. He doesn’t want to be important enough that battle is too dangerous for him to be part of. _He wasn’t supposed to be king._

Theobald’s nomination embarasses him. The man pulls out a scroll and reads out his _entire_ title on Gustavo’s death bed and it’s truly insane to see his dedication. But the reminder of the situation, the reminder of his titles, while meant well, does not help how Amethar feels. Being king, being the Unfallen, being nominated to be successor for a second time, makes the whole situation more real. There was some part of him that was living in denial previously, a part of him that has now snapped into reality. And when Gustavo names him successor, there is more sadness, grief, fear, and _pain._ _He wasn’t supposed to be king._

When they come to arrest Liam, Amethar feels shocked and _protective_. He’s just a kid, he’s a ward, a _prisoner_ in Castle Candy. He’s already spent so much time as a prisoner outside of a jail, something he doesn’t deserve one bit. There’s no way the kid deserves to be a teenager _in_ one. Amethar still feels guilty for Liam’s imprisonment in the castle, even though it seemed fairly necessary. The protectiveness he feels overpowers any other thoughts as fear and shock cover Liam’s face. And Amethar was certainly responsible for so many of the kid’s problems and the thought clouds his mind. _He wasn’t supposed to be king._

And when, not a day later, all his past mistakes come to light, it feels like a slap in the face. He can feel the shock and hurt and _betrayal_ coming from everyone as the truth comes out, and he feels numb. The numbness turns to fear and rage as he is excommunicated, as war is declared, as they are charged by guards. He had married a milkmaid in the Dairy Isles when he was a prince, fifth in line for the throne and nothing more. Who could have predicted that the war would have taken so much, forced so much on him? He’d made plenty of mistakes during his rule, but could anyone blame him? _He wasn’t supposed to be king._

**Author's Note:**

> 1) Amethar being the Unfallen kills me so much  
> 2) The working title for this fic was "devestating amethar fic"


End file.
